Ryan is the youth pastor for Reality Carp Youth. His nickname is “Rizz.”

In addition to spearheading the youth ministry at Reality Carpinteria, Rizz has also revolutionized the way the English language is spoken around Reality. He has single-handedly demolished the need for any type of adverbs, predicates, and the usage of many third-person singular pronouns.

Words like “it” are now considered outdated by the youth, as you may often hear sentence structures such as,

• Nobody hates, everybody loves (this means “we are all in agreement” and is missing the pronoun “this”)
• Nobody knows (this should say “nobody knows the answer to ______.)
• Best thing ever (this sentence would normally read “that’s really awesome”)
• Must needs (this sentence should read, “I really need that”)
• Just sayin’ (this sentence is missing “I” and an object. You say this when making a valid point, or just going on a tangent)
• Never been done before (something amazing just happened)
• I want all things (this means you want a specific thing, not all things)
• Hundo (this is short for “100”)
• Ohhh (in a high-pitched voice, this means you are overwhelmed)
• I mean…Really? (this is the same as ‘ohhh’ but with a direct object)

As you can see, Rizz has greatly influenced the way we talk in the office.